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By the Light of the Northern Star

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(11 Reviews)

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  • This is for those who know this album…perhaps you can help me…

    After hearing this incredible song about the virtues of a hammer, I decided that I must own one myself. Unfortunately the vocals went by too fast for me to discern much descriptive detail about the hammer, but with “virtue untold” and “hold the heathen hammer high with a manly cry” how could I not own one myself??? And just listen to how passionate this dude is when he sings about it- it’s gotta be a pretty wicked cool tool. I checked Home Depot and Lowe’s, neither of which was able to help me. At least when I spoke to the pimply faced clerk at ACE Hardware he said that they might be getting a shipment of heathen hammers in the fall. That’s only a few weeks away! What will I do in the interlude?

    The other songs on this album are impressive. Northern Gate for instance speaks of; you guessed it, a northern gate. One can only assume they mean New York, gateway to the world of finance and prosperity. “We have won the wars of late” I mean, that’s got Mergers and Acquisitions written ALL over it!

    By the Sore in my Hand is a little disturbing. I know I won’t be questioning the sore in his hand. I don’t want to be decapitated because I questioned the sore in his hand. Could it be the result of a particularly vicious paper cut? No, no, I shouldn’t ask. His voice was particularly menacing in that song. It scared me enough to require a change of underwear.

    I can’t wait until ACE gets a shipment of hammers!

    Posted on January 18, 2010